Who hasn’t had a crazy Sunday morning trying to get to church with kids? This blog entry by my friend Heather made me laugh so hard! I loved getting a peek of what it’s like to get all her girls ready (she has 4), especially since I only have boys. We spend considerably less time doing hair and coordinating outfits, and yet somehow we still manage to creep in at the back just before church starts (usually with an extra plastic snake or car hanging from somebody’s pockets).

It IS hard to get to church with kids. And to parents who have to do it alone, because of church callings, or because they are the only parent, it is even more amazing that you make it to church. My hat is off to you for your efforts. My husband had to work over Sundays for training for a few months, and I remember being exhausted after church trying to gather my 2 boys towards the car, while holding a squirming baby. Boy #2 (I’m still mad, can you tell?) darted out across the parking lot, and proceeded to run all the way across, ignoring my frantic calls. Luckily he wasn’t hit, but it was the straw that broke the camel’s back.  I went home bawling that day, swearing I’d never return alone again.

But as Heather describes, there really isn’t any other place that I want to be, or that I want my family to be at on Sundays. It brings a peace that you just can’t replace by staying home because it’s ‘easier’. Learning gospel principles and feeling the Lord’s love reminds me of my real purpose in being here, and brings great perspective as to why I had a family, and I am reminded that I need to draw on the Lord for strength more and complain less.

My sweet grandma used to tell me that she was sure angels walked the halways at church with the moms and dads holding fussy children. She was just sure that the parents (and even the fussy children) were being blessed for obeying, even though they didn’t hear much- and that the kids were learning by example to do what’s right, even when it is tiring. So thanks, Heather, for sharing this! It was very entertaining, and a good reminder of WHY I am willing to go through ‘Sunday chaos’ each week too.

Sunday Drama

By Heather Walker

Walking into church Sean and I congratulated ourselves out loud-

4 pair of panties for little buns-check

8 shoes on-check (oh, except Amelia (1 yr) already had hers off and
Sean was carrying them),

Lots of teeth brushed- check

4 heads of hair combed-check

A serious bag of cheerios- check

Our calling stuff-check

All four children- check
(once in a while someone slips through the cracks [Read more →]

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I received an invite to a private blog a few days ago, and when I logged in, it took me a minute to figure out that the invite was from a cousin on my dad’s side of the family.  (Before you judge me too harshly, you should know I have over 100 cousins).  I don’t remember for sure when I saw Candice last, so I was curious to see where her family was now. 

Candice had just run her first marathon in St. George, and her experience was incredible!.  I was so moved, I emailed her for permission to share her story.  There are many life parallels in her running experience.  Not only did it almost make me want to get up and run a marathon (I hate running), but it made me think about helping those around me as kindly as Lowell helped Candice.  It was such a simple thing, really, but Lowell’s act of service was an act of grace to a fellow struggling runner.  We are all running in life, and I believe we each experience a time during our race when we don’t think we can run any more. 

Candice never saw Lowell after the race, but when she shared her experience in church, a woman in the congregation approached her who had been Lowells’ neighbor in Idaho.  She gave Candice his contact information, and she was able to call him and thank him personally for his kindness.  Lowell emailed me the story behind his running experiences, which you can read after Candice’s article below.

Meet Lowell.  This is him in the St. George Maraton.           

This is Lowell running backwards.  Look how happy he is!  Wouldn’t you want to be running by him?

This is Candice being congratulated by her kids.

The hat and gloves…

Candice with her family.

My Marathon Experience, by Candice Rodgers

I finished my first marathon today! I ran it in 4 hours and 14 minutes. I really wanted to run it under 4 hours, but we had cold rain the whole 26.2 miles and my body took a turn for the worse because of it! Unfortunately, I was not dressed for the rain. My gloves were not waterproof, and I had taken off my soaked sweats and jacket at mile 4. Needless to say, I started to lose my body heat quickly [Read more →]

Lowell’s Running Story

For what it’s worth here is my running story in a nutshell.

My best friend Terry Jensen got me running in 1979 by going up to the ISU Minidome after work every night starting in January.  A month later I had gained a pound and could not run a mile.  Two months later I still struggled with a mile but had had two 2-mile runs and one 3-mile.  Terry challenged me to try and run 5 on the second Saturday in March.  When we went to the mindome I was sure I had the Black Plague as I didn’t think I could do even one mile.  Ended up running 10. 

We did some races and my first marathon on July 24th in Salt Lake on the Deseret News Course.  It was hard and Terry wasn’t there to meet me at Mile 22 like he promised .  So I really struggled.  He met me at Mile 24 down by Sears and chewed me out for walking.  He chided me until I was running again and I finally got to where I thought I was pretty fast once again and rather amazed I could still run.  While I was being so impressed with myself I looked over to Terry on my right and he was walking as fast as I was running!  Running can be relative.

On September 17th in 1979 I ran a race that started at 2 p.m. in 82 degree temps.  A 10K.  I was gung ho and ended up in the hospital with internal bleeding and was unable to run for another 5 years.  In 1984 I ran St. George for the first time and experienced the emotional fear of knowing running could kill you as it almost had me.  But at Mile 4 I “ran through a door” that put that fear behind me forever.  In those 5 years I had searched for answers to what had happened to me and we finally started to learn some things about heat and hydration the gave me enough sorta-confidence to walk through the fear of St. George.

We ran until 1992 and then got lazy for a decade.  Terry gave me an entry to St. George for my 60th Birthday on August 1, 2002.  He had pulled some strings to get me in as the lottery was closed and I had only 2 months to get ready; had only run some 10Ks.  That turned out to be the beginning of a nice running group with roots in Denver, Wichita and Pocatello. 

St. George this year was my 52nd marathon.  And my 12th St. George.  My fastest ever were two 3:32s in 1988 and 1989.  Third fastest ever was last year at St. George with a 3:44:59.  In the 65-69 age group last year I won my age division 5 of 8 marathons with one of them being a 6:18 at the Tecumseh Trail marathon in Indiana on December 1st.  That was a terribly tough forested course and included an extra mile as Terry and I ran an extra mile to get help for a lady in our group who hung up on a root and broke her leg and was bleeding.  This year I have only placed 1st one time; here in Pocatello.  But was 2nd in Ogden in May and 2nd in Alaska in June and 2nd at the Logan Top of Utah marathon in September.  I  was #3 in age the week after Ogden at the Bayshore Marathon in Traverse City, Michigan; Terry was #2.  Terry ran a 2:58 marathon back in the late 70s so we call him “JackRabbit” and I consider myself lucky any time I beat him.

I am not competitive but am in love with the kind people I meet running.  It is an area of my life where I have learned you can be totally “safe” and never have to watch your words and be fun and open with people.  Runners are the best friends and the best citizens and neighbors as they have discovered that real health is just recognizing the only race in life is with yourself.

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This article is actually one of the experiences that stirred my thoughts towards creating TheFamilySoup in the first place this last summer.  Perfectionism is very real and is a part of our lives in varying degrees.  But in this story, you get to be an outsider looking in at some one else trying to be perfect. It’s much easier to recognize it in somebody else than in yourself.  This is only one small part of Jamie’s story, but I’ve chosen to focus on it because I think it’s worth talking about. Tell me what you think. 

In reading about perfectionism, I came across a few quotes you might enjoy.  Some are funny, some are serious…

-No one is perfect… that’s why pencils have erasers. ~Author Unknown

-Striving for excellence motivates you; striving for perfection is demoralizing. ~Harriet Braiker

 -A man would do nothing if he waited until he could do it so well that no one could find fault. ~John Henry Newman

-To escape criticism - do nothing, say nothing, be nothing. ~Elbert Hubbard

-Use what talents you possess; the woods would be very silent if no birds sang except those that sang best. ~Henry van Dyke

-Gold cannot be pure, and people cannot be perfect. ~Chinese Proverb

 -When you aim for perfection, you discover it’s a moving target. ~George Fisher

Perfect Perfectionism, by Bethany Cory

(Note-  This week, the story I am choosing to share is one that I will be relating on behalf of a family member. As of today, this particular family member’s experience is still too difficult for her to write about personally, though she did attempt it. And so I will be sharing with you her voice in this article through my own words, with her permission. I will refer to her as ‘Jamie’).

Jamie is a beautiful, gorgeous girl. She is bright, talented, smart, funny, and kind. [Read more →]

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This is perhaps one of the most touching articles to me personally for several reasons. For one, the subject matter is extremely personal and challenging to talk openly about. I commend Jen for her willingness to share her experience so others can benefit. Perhaps somebody suffering with a mental illness will recognize their own need for help, or for the help of a loved one. Or perhaps somebody will simply judge a little less. Until you’ve walked in their shoes…

Second, this is a letter written by my dear sister-in-law to her sister. The sister the letter is addressed to has been struggling with severe bi-polar and schizophrenia for years. To this day, she does not see her need for help, though she is currently receiving treatment. This sister is a courageous spirit with a fiery testimony of God and an intense love for her family. It is very painful to watch a loved one live in pain, plagued by their own mind. The movie ‘A Beautiful Mind’ is a tender one to the family.

Finally, to the author of this article, Jen, I want to thank her for being an example to me and a person I admire greatly. She is so amazing. Walking down the street, you would never pick out Jen as having to deal with this struggle of Bipolar II. She has served as Relief Society President, Primary President and a Stake Primary leader. She is truly an example of a woman who puts her trust in God for her struggles, as we all must do for our own, and as a person who has taken what limitations she has in life and still continued to live.

Dear Sister:

Please know that I respect your indicated wishes to not have me delve too much into your diagnosis or condition, but on the other hand I value you so much as my sister and hope you will allow me to [Read more →]

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I first heard about Bev when I was having dinner at my cousin Janet’s house in Las Vegas.  She told me about this grandma they had adopted back in WA during law school.  Beverly had no family left and I was amazed by her story.  Janet had Bev write about her experience so we could hear what she went through.  I feel like I don’t even have the words to relate what this woman has gone through, and how she has handled it. 

What is also interesting is that for Janet, her relationship with Bev is a blessing to her too.  This relationship is two sided, and mutually beneficial.   How amazing that these two people found each other and have kept in touch.   Thanks Bev for sharing your story!  I feel much more courageous and grateful today for my family.  And I feel more humble from Janet’s example of friendship and a persevering and welcoming heart. 

This is Bev with two of Janet’s boys.

Janet posted Bev’s story as well as her own experience on her blog.  The following are both stories…

 Our Adopted Grandma, by Janet Shumway

 I have been wanting to introduce you to a dear friend of mine for some time now. She means so much to me and even though I have only known her for two short years, she has been such an influence for good in my life. I feel privileged and grateful to have a friend like her and thought you would all benefit from getting to know her better.

The short intro is this: Bev is 80 years old.. She is going to hate that I told you her age, but she should be PROUD of it! She has said herself, “80 is the new 60.” And she is right about that! She is spunky and energetic and fun. She stays in shape with Weight Watchers and her weekly yoga classes. She volunteers at the local hospital. She has an immaculate garden in Spokane, WA. (The hardest thing about leaving Spokane was moving away from Bev –but I couldn’t convince her to move to Vegas!) She is a widow who has been through tremendous heartache in her life. She has lived abroad while her husband served in the Armed Forces. She is a SURVIOR. [Read more →]

My Journey Through Grief, by Bev Olson

My story begins on March 2nd, 1954 with the death of an 8 pound baby boy a few hours after birth in an Air Force Base Hospital in Bitburg, Germany a month after I arrived there to join my husband who was stationed there. My oldest daughter, Janet who was 4 and a half and I had flown there in early February.We named him Dennis James and he was buried in an American section of a cemetery in Frankfurt. [Read more →]

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What can I say about Adam?  He’s been best friends with Calvin since highschool, and is the husband of my best friend.  Yes, Calvin set them up when we were dating.  They are practically family. 

If you were to take a peak into the Michaelson home, you’d find a mom, a dad, 4 boys, 1 girl, and 1 dog.  And usually some neighbor kids too.  My kids love going there because there is a just a warm feeling of family (and because it usually smells good too from Summer’s cookin’). 

Thats why I love this entry.  It’s real.  This post (that I found on his blog) is only for people that have ever raised their voice while raising their kids…

Take a Deep Breath, by Adam Michaelson

The day was coming to a crescendoing close, as it sometimes does. Summer and I were expending every effort to get the kids ready for bed and into the loft for the day’s closing ceremonies — because by golly, we were going to have a spiritual scripture study and prayer. At some point, Cody (our dog) got in my way, and any control I had at that point slipped from my fingers. I raised my voice at Cody and carted him downstairs and out the back door. As I was rushing Cody downstairs, I heard Daniel (5 yrs) say “I think dad lost his temperature.” [Read more →]

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I can’t believe this story really happened. And to my sister-in-law, too! I’ve heard it many times, and I always think of the amazing friendship, faith and service that took place. But this time while I read it, I remembered something. During our financial struggles a few years ago, this same sister-in-law sent us a check in the mail for $100 to use for necessities. It came at a much needed time and was put to good use. I’d forgotten about that. I love that the service of Becca’s wedding dress didn’t stop. I know it wasn’t comfortable for them to give $100. They have a growing family living on a budget on the east coast. It reminds me that since our financial crisis has passed, it’s time we pass on the generosity. Hmmm…

The Wedding Dress, by Becca McFadden

The coolest experience I have ever had was the experience of my wedding dress. If you have a minute, I will share it. It is a most special description of the hand of the Lord in our lives!

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